Top 10 worst chat up lines I’ve heard

worst-chat-up-linesIt’s one of my many goals in life to get the whole world laid. Therefore, I see it as my duty to inform you all of the 10 Worst Chat Up Lines Ever!

If you’ve ever uttered one of these cringeworthy ice breakers in your efforts to pull, then hang your head in shame. You’re doing the male of the species no favours in their quest for pussy!

It’s cool to take the funny, relaxed approach when trying your luck with a fitty, chatting up girls and flirting should be fun, but these whoppers are likely to turn a girl’s panties as dry as the Sahara.

On the other hand they’re almost guaranteed to raise a laugh while out with the lads…so here they are, I’ll leave it to up to your discretions guys…

1. ‘Wow! Are those real!?’
‘Why yes, yes they are. Would you like to feel them?’ … is the reply we’d all LIKE to hear. I’m genuinely saddened to say the reality is more likely going to be a far cry from that fantasy.

2. ‘Hey baby, will you be my love buffet so I can lay you on the table and take what I want?’
Groooan! Ok so the being spread out the table for an all you can eat session is pretty hot, I’ll give it that much, but love buffet!? Really!?!?

3. ‘How about you sit on my lap and we see what pops up?’
Unless it’s a hot babe dancing for a twenty, it’s highly unlikely to have the desired effect.

4. ‘You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away’
I LOL’d…. but it won’t get a guy laid that’s for sure!

5. ‘Do you sleep on your stomach? No. Can I?’
Cringeworthy and painfully cheesy. Don’t do it to yourself!

6. ‘You’re ugly, but you intrigue me..’
Ok, it might just work…

7. ‘I’ve had quite a bit to drink and you’re beginning to look pretty good…’
Ouch. That one’s never gonna be dubbed ‘the pantie soaker’ now is it?

8. ‘Do you come here often?’
Booooring. It’s been done more times than Ron Jeremy and shows a lack of effort/originality.

9. ‘Are you free tonight or is it gonna cost me?’
Needless to say implying a woman is a hooker the first time you speak to her isn’t going to impress her one bit, unless of course she is. In which case you might just be in luck!

10. ‘I just sh*t my pants. Can I get in yours?’
Depends on your kink I guess….but I’m gonna go with the majority of ladies finding this a huge turn OFF.

Have you heard worse? Perhaps used worse and pulled them off? Then let me know all your weird and wonderful chat up lines/stories below, I always love hearing from you.

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